What are your beauty dilemmas??

[Deanna (Domestic Chicky)]

Can't find the right foundation? Want to find skin care that works for you? Have frizzy & fried when you want sleek & shiny?

What works for you? What product would you NOT recommend?
What kind of products would you give your eyeteeth for??

[Deanna (Domestic Chicky)]

Unfortunately this happens sometimes as your skin gets used to new products. I still get breakouts at 40! Proactive is a great product, but it is notorious for sometimes making your skin worse before it gets better. Be gentle on breakout prone skin - it seems like scrubbing it clean will make it better, but your skin often reacts the opposite way! One thing I have discovered lately is using a micro - exfoliant works so much better on my skin than a regular scrub. Avon makes a great one, so does Philosophy.
You may want to check with a dermatologist just to see if there are options before you try harsher chemicals or medications. Hope this helps!

[Jeanine]

I have no idea of what hair style would look good on me or what colors of make or clothing to wear. I suck at this sort of thing. I cannot afford the $20 + products that the department stores sell.

[M3]

Jeanine, what colors make you feel pretty when you put them on?? What colors, historically, have you loved? Start there. I don't mean to interrupt Deanna (and I have no idea how to help you pick a hair style), but clothing color and make-up color is fun. Just think of the colors you feel alive in, sophisticated in, fun in and see if they don't fall into a color family. Years ago, everyone was getting their colors done and, with a bit of common sense, that approach really did work. I have dark brown eyes, yellow-undertoned skin, and (this year) blonde again hair (okay, it was blonde as I was growing up, then I changed it a lot. Now I have so much grey, blonde is the easiest color to have!), so the autumn colors really do look best on me. I have never felt good in baby colors: Baby Blue, Baby Yellow, Baby Pink and, lo and behold, they are definitely not autumn colors. (There were tons of books on the subject. Color Me Beautiful by Carole Jackson is the one I just found when i did a quick search.) Anyway, just thought I'd throw in my 2 cents. Hope it helpful! M3

[Deanna (Domestic Chicky)]

Great advice M3! Finding out your color family is a HUGE help in finding colors that suit you. Even just determining if you are a warm or a cool is a big help!

[M3]

Ali, don't know how old you are, but I finally stopped fussing with OTC and found an awesome dermatologist at 41...it was the best, best, best decision I ever made. I use Cetaphil (no knockoffs - they say right on their bottle they don't make a generic version of their wash), Retin A, spironolactone, and doxycycline. (Apparently, I have "mature woman acne" now!! ) I used Retin A for about a year after my first son was born and my hormones didn't settle down, then I had no more problem until I weaned #3 when I was 37...I think my body was rushing to catch up to perimenopause after 2 1/2 years of pregnancy and nursing. After two years and tons of money on OTC products, I went to a laser derm and didn't get good results. Moved 1500 miles and found a terrific dermatologist. Truly, I spend less on doctor's appts and medications than I did on OTC products.

[Deanna (Domestic Chicky)]

Were your breakouts hormonal or constant? I am 41 too, and stil break out, and have been considering going to a Dr too, but since I breakout more "once a month", I wasn't sure if it would help...

[M3]

Deanna, my acne was constant, but some weeks were better than others. The dermatologist explained to me that at "our age" our hormones aren't and that is why you think you get a handle on it and then it all goes out the window. I cannot say enough how pleased I was with the results...but if you get a dermatologist who doesn't listen to you first, get out of the office and get another one. He really asked a lot of questions...like: Have you started noticing more acne on your jawline? Have you noticed any stray hairs popping up where there didn't used to be any? Has you acne seemed to be different than it used to be? Apparently, the perimenopause we've all read about can cause acne, even in women who didn't have it before. I cannot say enough how pleased I have been with this dermatologist experience and I urge you to get recommendations for one in your area.

[Sarah Kimmel]

Check out www.acne.org it's what finally got me clear! It's great cause while he has his own products he also tells you what will work at your local drugstore. I do like his products better though.

[Jenni]

I am so afraid of changing my hair, but I really want to. I have had the exact same hair for 20 years. Not kidding. I do like the color, but I'm getting tired of seeing the same picture with more wrinkles. But, the problem is, I am absolutely paranoid of getting my hair professionally cut.

Do you have any suggestions for fine, slightly wavy hair that looks best off my face (no bangs)? I've just been cutting it blunt for years. I have to keep it long enough to wear it back (grubby fingers).

Everyone tells me layers, but the thought of layer is just scary to me. I don't know where my irrational fear of stylists comes from.

[Kacie]

Change can be really scary! And somehow, if we have a bad haircut, it can completely ruin a day/our self image.

I haven't had a haircut in 8 months. I wear it in a ponytail or a bun each day. It looks sloppy and like I'm still in college.

I NEED a new haircut now. I need to stop looking like I've given up.

I'm going to do it this week, I've decided.

I hope you get the courage to make a change! And, more importantly, I hope you like it!

Anyhow, back to you, Jenni:

Since you haven't had a change in so long, and appear to be sort of afraid of a hairstylist, I'd like to toss in a few suggestions:

-Go to a salon where the stylists really know what they're doing. Get recommendations from women who have fantasic cuts. No newbies for you--even if that means it'll be expensive.

-Arrange for a consultation-only appointment. I realize that might be hard since you have small children, but having a stylist spend some time with you, talking about what you want, discussing ideas, and then you walking out of there to think about it for a few days might be a good thing.

You are beautiful! You have gorgeous eyes. What about cutting your hair short? You might have to move gradually, but if you need to be able to pull it in a ponytail to get it out of the way...why not just get it out of the way in a more extreme sense?

Not like, a crop cut or anything, but maybe above the shoulders?

And, of course, if you hate it...it will grow back.

[Deanna (Domestic Chicky)]

I would start by asking people you see with great haircuts where they get theirs done - you may find a lot of people are getting great cuts from the same place or the same person! Depending on where you live, there may be high end salons that have a training night (stay with me here) where you can get a completely supervised cut. If you aren't comfortable with that, go in for that consultation only appointment. Go armed with pictures of exactly what you want, and let them know you are fearful. The right stylist will understand, and ease you into any changes. I would definitely consider layers, since you mentioned you had wavy, fine hair, you may find that some GOOD layering will release some of that wave and you may find you have really nice curl! I would stay away from definite bangs, but a great sideswept bang with some long layers would give you a lot of options.

[Rachel]

I finally changed my hair style for the first time in over 20 years. Even as a baby I had the same style. :) Anyways, I went from a straight cut with bangs to layers and no bangs. I have shoulder length hair now, it had been down to my waist. I love the layers. It's so much easier to deal with. I made the change gradually. I started with some face framing layers then moved on to shorter layers in the back. Then I got 12 in. cut off and gradually just got shorter with each visit. It's hard to make change but I'm so glad I did. Find a stylist and just move slow. That way she can get familiar with what you like and you can come to trust her.